Home » 2011 » Gosh, when am I going to get over this shyness?

Gosh, when am I going to get over this shyness?

So I met this guy that I was crushing on over the summer again – for the second time.  And I just fell flat.  Didn’t make an opportunity to talk to him much.  Didn’t joke around.  Couldn’t joke around!  I just really wanted him to notice me…but hanging around opposite to where he was and doing nothing wasn’t a very good approach 😦  I don’t know what’s wrong with me when it comes to boys?  I’m usually totally fine with laughing and talking and meeting people.  But last night was so not magical, haha.

I’m such a newbie when it comes to dating, and I wish I wasn’t.  I have no guts to ask anyone out!!! Ugh.  So sad.  But, I really feel like this guy isn’t interested in me.  I feel like he doesn’t even know I’m in the same room as him.  Or maybe it’s just me and my low confidence when it comes to boys kicking in.  I dont ‘know!  But I want to get over this fear so badly!  Maybe what I hav to do is ask him out on a date and if he rejects me, then I need to adopt an attitude like it doesn’t matter.  I don’t know…. 😦  But I shouldn’t think so negative about the whole thing.

I am pathetic….but he just makes me feel different – ever since I met him that one summer night… It’s not what he said or what he did that night that intrigued me.  It was just his presence.  Yup, just as simple as that.  I don’t know how to describe the feeling…but just something in me felt more awake when I met him.  But I wasn’t able to see if he felt the same way.  It kind of seemed like he didn’t lol.  Oh well 😦 

I know I’m a sad case…but I have to work on ‘growing some balls’ this year when it comes to men lol.


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