I figured out that the guy I was crushing on for the past lil while is actually not single 😦 Oh well. I am glad I found that out sooner than later…but I’m definitely sad about it. It’s hard to come by a guy who makes you feel something else. But hey, I can’t say I haven’t felt the chemistry with other guys before. It does exists…it’s just rare I guess. But…I’m sure someone else will make me feel that way someday 🙂
I am so excited about a lot of things and people that are in my life. I have some amazing ppl around me…and I’m so grateful for that. I am just worried about Rashmi. She’s going through some things that I know she will come out of strongly, but it’s just been eating her alive for far too long. She is such a lovely person…with so much heart and soul. I just want her to be happy. And to not worry so much in life. I sometimes wish I had the power to take away some of that stress/burden/sadness she is feeling. I want her to be free from it all, and just….just happy and light for once.
I’m continuing this post from last night. I got a chance to talk to Rashmi this afternoon and she sounds like she did a 180! The conversation was very light and positive. I am happy to hear that in her voice today. She was talking to me about ‘The Power’. The power of love. And how you really can attract so much positiveness in your life using the power of love that you already have. I want her to be happy. I want that for each and every one of us.
I was at Chapters with Ani today. I got an iRewards card. I’m making the commitment to read more this year…and hopefully years to come. We ended up at Chapters because Ani was feeling sad that we had to give Chase to the vet to get him neutered. So I took her to Starbucks and we shared a vanilla buttercream cupcake and bought some yummy drinks. It was really chill…but, of course, we had a lil sadness in the back of our minds thinking about how Chase would be doing.
When I was exploring through the aisles of Chapters, I picked up a book called ‘love is letting go of fear’. I was reading some of the pages, and the one I came across when I opened the book talked about what Rashmi talked about today. Basically that we have so much love to give away – endless amount actually. So when we give away love without expecting anything back…. we are giving away positiveness out to the universe. Which can only lead to good things. So why not give?
When I talked to Rashmi after our Chapters run, she was telling me how giving away love, like as simple as thinking something good/positive about someone who you met on the streets (someone you have no connection with) can only be a good thing. Which I completely agree with.
I am feeling more uplifted after talking to her. I think she will be okay. I want her to be more than okay. But, hearing her speak today made me feel like she’s figured it out.
I have no doubt in my mind that those who think pure thoughts…those who have that genuine glow around then…those that feel beautiful things towards ppl will be happy in the end. And I believe that Rashmi is this person. And she will be happy.
As for Chase…we all miss him at home. It’s not the same without that lil one running here and there. I hope he’s doing okay. I called the vet to see if he was alright, and she said the procedure went perfectly. I always debate to myself if this was the right thing to do. There are obvious good things about getting him neutred..for health reasons and not fostering any puppies that might end up in shelters. But, did I have the right to take away that from him?
I asked the vet if they can add on as many things as possible so he feels the least amount of pain. We went with a laser option instead to minimize the bleeding. I got him on IV fluids. I think I did the most I can. But it is still hard to imagine him lying there right now… I love that lil guy. The house is definitely empty without him.
I am just fortunate to have the things I have. Honestly.
I’m going to get back to this internship I’m applying for with the CSI. I hope Gagan and I both get it. We are oozing with ideas….and I think this place is where it can all happen! 🙂